Ever felt violated? I’m sure you have if you have done business for a while and you have some worth and value, you have attracted takers. Sure, they can recognize that you can change their lives in some ways. It’s why they’re around in the first place.
Or, maybe you are a taker. You think of business as trying to get all the chips for yourself leaving none for others.
It’s a struggle being a taker today in this connected economy. Your reputation gets spread quickly, but it may be lost on you.
Here’s the reality that givers – those that freely give of themselves, and matchers – those that look for reciprocal value, experience:
- Others feel compelled to give of themselves back to givers and matchers
- Serendipity happens more freely
- Compounding effects occur because favors are traded
- Relationships and networks are larger and active
- There’s less reset in effort and life tends to be easier
I look at takers with a bit of pity. It’s a strategy and a bad one at that. When everyone has choices and are connected, the idea that you can get ideas, information or help for free is absurd. There are simply too many other people out there for givers and matchers to help and invest in.
Sure, you might get something in the short term. But don’t expect the same doors to be opened on the next go around. And the truth is that you will need many go arounds to get to where you are going. You will merely have a one and done.
Yes, the payout is short-term, but it is also short-lived. We all have good memories when we don’t feel reciprocity or feel gratification from our efforts.
If you don’t feel like you are getting ahead, then you may want to look at your strategy. Think about the last week. How much have you given? Can you make a list of 20 people you have made an impact or given real value to? Can you think of 20 people you are valuable to? Might be worth asking if you find yourself stuck. The givers and matchers are well beyond this question.
